An Imaginary Significant Life Event

To: (everyone at work)
From: Hank
Date: 06/27/09 10:37pm
Subject: Sayonara

Well, everyone, I wish I could say it's been a pleasure. I wish I could say how much I enjoyed your bickering, your backstabbing, your whining and complaining and your last-minute demands. I wish I could say a lot of things but in the interest of brevity--and that fact that now I have better things to do with my time!!!--I'll keep this short.

I out of here! My prayers have been answered and effectively immediately I no longer work with you!


Hank


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To: (everyone at work)
From: Hank
Date: 06/28/09 9:53am
Subject: Disregard

Never mind, I misread one of the numbers on my lottery ticket. See you tomorrow!


Hank